Revelations
by BlueFireIce
Summary: Botan decides to trust Hiei with things she had never told anyone before even her love but will it really be enough to get the fire demon to fall in love with her? HieixBotan YusxKei YukxKuw KurxShi LAST CHAPTER UP!
1. Botan isn't who she poses to be

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of it's characters**

"Hiei please don't ignore me. I really need to talk with you. After this I promise I won't bother you again about anything. So please just come down and listen to me." Botan pleaded to the demon in the tree. He was sleeping quietly when she came and just started shouting off nonsense to him. Since when did she _need _to talk to him of all people? Well he could esily ignore her and keep on sleeping but sadly he knew that wasn't going to happen.

"If it's so important Onna then why don't you come up here and tell me?" Botan sighed and hopped on her oar and flew next to the branch Hiei was on. She knew he wasn't going to be getting down for her news but she just had to tell him. He deserved to know about it even if afterward he would want to kill her. She didn't do anything wrong either but she knew he would want to kill her. Botan didn't mind though because this bit was worth dying for.

"Hiei I know you remember years ago when you made me make a promise about Yukina." Botan started. Hiei's eyes opened and they were flared up and glaring at her. He was already thinking she had broken her promise but technically she did nothing wrong. "Well I kept it like I promised I would...but I don't think that was enough. I never once said anything to Yukina about you being her brother. I mean I hinted it a few times but Yukina seriously had no clue what I was talking about. To what you would believe to be unfortunate luck she found out. I said nothing but she called me over to her house all happy and when I went inside she said she had finally figured out who her brother was. She said she was so happy to have you as a brother and that she knew there was some reason to why you kept it from her for so long. She didn't want to question why you did though because she doesn't want to upset you."

Hiei growled and leapt upon Botan's oar, ready to choke her when he looked her in the eyes though he froze.Her eyes were knowing and sad...but she still held a smile on her face. Yes she was technically death itself but her human shell could die yet she stared death (herself) in the face with only a smile and knowing eyes. She knew what was to come and she accepted it without pain or regret. Her eyes were telling Hiei something that he didn't quite understand but it froze him to the core. Looking her in the eyes was like she had paralyzed him; waiting for him to come upon a realization he not yet knew about.

"Kill me if you so wish. You and I both know I did nothing wrong but for this I'm willing to die an honorable death." Botan smiled a little more at him but her deep inviting eyes did not faulter. They stared back at Hiei's and kept him still. He couldn't bring himself to look away. He had never been in such a trance as this one before. In this one he had no known information about his oppenent. Obviously her weaknesses were not as they seemed and her strength wasn't what she put it out to be. The woman sitting on the oar with him was not the woman he had known all these years. She was someone else; not new but old. She was someone with knowledge and wisdom. Botan was someone who knew about things no one should know about and she took them into her heart and kept them safe. These things she knew were her valuables and she knew how to keep them safe and when to take them out.

"Die an honorable death for what?" Hiei had finally managed the will power to move his mouth but he did not look away. He barely blinked his eyes for fear he would miss something important that she wanted to show him. She smiled gently at him which only kept him still more. Her smiles along with the eyes she was holding for him now made him wonder and question anything and everything he knew about the 'baka onna.' At this moment he knew not a thing about her. Her moves were unexpected and her striking calamity toward his mind was hard. He could dodge the fastest and wittiest of all demons but her... well he could not dodge what he didn't see and what he didn't see was what lie ahead and that was her strength. For some how she knew of the future but would not give into his pleas. She wouldn't give into his need for that knowledge. She only smiled and spoke gently to him.

"I 'm willing to die an honorable death for the love between siblings and if that is how I must go then I will." Botan continued to smile and her eyes continued their silent assault on Hiei. It was true that the eyes were windows to the soul but what no one knew was that those windows could be closed and could be replaced with pretty décor to elude you from the truth. He was now seeing past the décor and into the house of the beholder and what he saw inside was what he didn't expect. Though no chaos was in her eyes Hiei could see the pain. He could see the distance that she held from everyone. It was much deeper than his own and to see that she would be willing to die for his sister's happiness much like himself surprised him.

"Do you want to go see her?" Botan calmly asked. Her eyes then looked wise and understanding. Her cheery disposition opposed the truth that her eyes told. It was a total contrast and it scared Hiei more and more but the way her eyes were like that of an old spirit that knew more than should be known forced him to sit down upon the oar and let her fly to their destination. Hiei half expected Botan to giggle and go back to normal and fly like the maniac he had known her to become but that didn't happen. She gently flew to the ice demon's home without a word said. It was a sad silence more so than not and it disturbed Hiei yet entranced him all the same. They landed quietly and Botan just stood there. He didn't know where to go but was to afriad to look Botan in the eyes again for fear he would find more than he wanted to.

"I'm not her brother Hiei. I'm not allowed in there right now. It is not my time. When you're ready you can enter into the light that you've feared so much." Botan said only loud enough for Hiei to hear. He took in a deep breath and headed up the steps to Genkai's house. He understood why she left him at the steps. She was allowing him time alone. She was letting him think and get himself ready to face his fear. She knew very well that he could use his demonic speed to get up there but she also knew that he would not. When he finally reached the last step he prepared himself and walked to the door of his light. He knocked and was greeted with the smile of Yukina. She hugged him, not saying a word but just hugged him. For a minute he was shocked but then he grasped onto Yukina like his life depended on it. He had always wished this was the way it would be but he never thought...never knew that this would come.

"Thank you Hiei...my brother." Yukina whispered to him and pulled away. She knew that there were many things that could be said but no words were needed. Hiei understood to that she knew that he needed to go back down there and that Botan was waiting for him. With one last hug they left each other for another time and Hiei slowly made his way down the steps. He could see the ferry onna's blue hair flying in the wind and started to think about the realization that she knew and he couldn't come upon. The whole way down he thought and when he reached Botan again he dared to look in her eyes. As soon as he did the realization hit him.

"She's proud of you Hiei...whether your deeds are good or bad she will always be proud of you." Botan stated and Hiei pulled himself to look away. Her oar popped out and she got on it and with one last look at Hiei she flew away. He chuckled lightly to himself. How could he have never seen it before and she did? Well she was well over a thousand years old. The information they shared between only the two of them was something that would help them both through everyday.

"Even if you can't see the future Hiei ... you can still move along." Botan, though she wasn't there, whispered into his head. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and walked off. He would see Yukina another day. Now though he had to think about things.

**Well I'm very proud of this chapter and I hope to continue it farther. There will be another chapter and if it takes forever to update I'm sorry! I'm not good with deadlines TT**


	2. Botan's death

**Dislcaimer: I do not own yu Yu Hakusho or it's characters**

Hiei was sitting in his favorite tree close to Kurama's house thinking about the other day when he and Botan shared a rare moment that most beings don't get to share. Hiei, though would never admit it to anyone else but himself, was in awe of the Onna. She had truly surprised him with how calm she was but how strong she could be at the same time. Hiei rarely ever got in awe. Almost anytime he was in awe it was because of something his sister Yukina did. Though what she did most of the time was the usual it still would amaze Hiei. Like before she knew he was her brother she would continue her search for him as he had done for her, believing that he had not died. She was very observant to notice how Hiei was protecting her all the time and that he was her brother. He did know it showed a little more than he wanted it to but only Kurama, Yusuke, and Botan seemed to have noticed. He could only assume the old hag had noticed as well but didn't say anything because she knew his reasoning.

"Hiei, you seem in deep contemplatioin. Are you thinking about Yukina again?" Kurama called up to the demon. Hiei sighed and got down from his tree. Kurama was his closest friend so he figured he could tell him. They walked in silence into Kurama's home and his mother welcomed them and they went up into Kurama's room. Hiei walked in and sat on the bed, an unusual thing for him to do. Kurama took note of the odd behavior sat down beside his troubled friend. It was silence for a while and both men were thinking many things.

"Hiei I know that you're thinking more than about Yukina. You know you can confide in me." Kurama gently told his friend. Hiei nodded his head but said nothing. The now tall fire demon, after years of growing, was afraid that anyone was capable of putting him into the trance Botan had done the other day. He knew he had to chose his words carefully so that he didn't get caught into paralyzation. He dared to look into Kurama's eyes and inwardly sighed in happiness that Kurama's eyes only seemed they're natural inviting color.

"The other day the Onna came to me and informed me that Yukina, on her own, figured out that I was her brother. Though that bothered me a lot that's not what's bothering me most now. When she told me I made a huge mistake and looked her in the eyes." Hiei said. Kurama's head, though he probably had done this without thinking, tilted his head to the side like a confused animal. He didn't understand why that was a mistake and Hiei then remembered that he was probably one of the only ones to see beyond what Botan showed everyone.

"Fox, her eyes were so deep and intense it litterally froze me. I felt I couldn't move, like she had put me in some kind of trance. Her eyes had so much in them yet at the same time so little and it scared me. You'd think she's nice and bubbly but she's not. She's more than anyone could ever imagine. She holds more back from the group than even I, myself, do." Hiei said, trying to keep his crazed emotions down. He was feeling confused and amazed at the same time and he didn't even know that was at all possible.

"I don't doubt what you say Hiei, for even though I have never seen it, I know Botan is much more than she dares to show. I have the feeling she's hiding something from us all. I don't know what it is but I know that it is something huge. Maybe you've gotten to see a part of what she's holding from the rest of us. Obviously she trusts you enough to show you her true self." Kurama said. Then it went silent. Hiei was trying to figure out why Botan would trust him with personal things such as her true self.

"I have a feeling that even Koenma has never seen such a side of Botan." Kurama said. This seriously didn't help Hiei's dilema. He was now wondering more why him? What did he do to gain her trust? All he did was insult her yet she pulled him in and trusted him enough to show him such things no one had seen. Hiei stood up form the bed and walked to the window.

"Maybe she's trying to reach out to you and show you something. You're important to her Hiei. Keep her safe and she'll return the favor." Kurama said. Hiei knew that Kurama didn't mean she would keep Hiei safe phsycially but Hiei didn't know how she would keep him safe otherwise. He didn't respond but went out the window and back into his forest. Kurama allowed himself a smile and then sat at his desk and started on some homework he had left. He knew the anti-social fire demon would be back for help.

Hiei was so confused about why this was happening. He couldn't figure out why she would trust him of all people with such important information. He had already come to realization that the entire group knew less about Botan than they thought they did. Then he realized that they didn't even know how she had died. She had never told anyone and he wasn't even sure himself if she was over a thousand years old or not. He could only guess that she was with how much wisdom she held. The demon reached his tree and jumped up into the branch and leaned against the tree and closed his eyes. A nap would do him good with all this confusion and stress. Only he couldn't sleep for someone had just come to his branch. He opened his eyes and saw Botan sitting in front of him.

"Hello Hiei." Her voice wasn't chipper like it normally was and she hadn't a smile on her face but she still looked happy to see him. Her eyes were twinkling with happiness. This wasn't the usual happiness that was in there though. This happiness had reason behind it and Hiei got the distinct feeling it was because of him. He sat up a little straighter and looked back at Botan. He was still a little afraid to look her in the eyes but he did and he realized that he didn't get as caught in them for he became used to the look she held with ease. It seemed to suit her now.

"I overheard you and Kurama talking and I do know you're confused. Kurama seems to do that to a lot of people. You don't have reason to be confused about why I trust you though." Botan said. So she had been listening to them. Why hadn't either sensed her? Well Hiei couldn't be sure if Kurama did or didn't. Knowing him he probably knew she was there but just left it alone. Hiei now wanted to know why he didn't notice her presence. He should have felt her energy near by but maybe he was too stuck in thought to realize it.

"Why shouldn't I be confused? Why would you trust me of all peoeple? The weilder of the darkness flame? My past shows that trust should never be given to me yet I have it given to me all the time." Hiei said. Botan laughed lightly. Not a happy laugh but more so an ironic laugh. His eyes narrowed at the ferry girl as she continued to laugh lightly. It ceased though and she was calm again. Then he looked in her eyes and he had made that mistake again. She pulled him in again because her eyes weren't the same like last time. They were comforting and understanding but with some sorrow. It was as if she knew just where he stood and why he stood there and yet she continued to coax him to her side. She froze him again but she was smiling now. That never helped Hiei.

"I have my reasons for trusting you. You've seen much more than anyone should and been through things I know about. I know the feeling you know and I wish to trust you. I'm not asking for your trust in return or your sympathy. I do not ask you listen to me or bother with what I say. I ask for nothing in return for my trust to you. I do trust you though and you deserve to know that much. If you do not wish to return the trust that is fine. I will not be hurt because I understand the pain and distance you dare to hold with everyone for I've felt it to. I've felt your pain and I've walked in your shoes before." Botan sounded solem as she said such things to him. Hiei didn't understand. How did she know how he felt? How had she been in his shoes? Was she trusting him more and letting him into what her life was before she died?

"How could you know my pain? You aren't me." Hiei sneered at her. Botan's smile did not faulter and her eyes were still comforting. This made Hiei angry. How could she still smile at him when he had just gotten mad at her? He had accused her of lying and yet she still welcomed him in.

"I know of your pain. I've gone through it myself Hiei. I've seen many things in my time. Though I'm not a day over seventy I'm much more wise than people would think. When you have to fly souls that many times you learn much. I died at 20 and my body hasn't grown older. I looked like this when I was twenty. I have been a spirit for 50 years. It was a sad life I lived and I tried my best not to die but in the world I was in it was hard for me. I'm sure it's hard for you as well. I was shunned as well. I was shunned for my appearence and gender. My family was a house full of boys and my mother had died giving birth to me. I had to keep up with my brothers and father. it was difficault considering they had trained for years to be assasins and I had to start as soon as I could walk. That wasn't easy for a klutz like me. When I was alive I was as klutzy as I appear to be now." Botan laughed darkly at the memory. Hiei had never heard that kind of laugh from her. She always had a high happy laugh but once again Hiei knew she was different than she posed to be.

"I couldn't keep up with them and my father found me to be a disgrace to the family name. So when I hit twnety him and my brother's locked me in a room and left me for dead. They said a woman in the family couldn't ever be an assasin for she was beneath men. They also said my entire body was a disgrace to the assasin name. No true assain could have hair like mine and I was just a weakling. The room I was locked in was complete concrete and slowly I just starved and died of thrist. They said a woman in the family like me wasn't allowed to eat or drink. I was only supposed to die so they wouldn't have to deal with me. When I died Koenma had asked how I died but I refused to tell him. All I let him know was that I hadn't been home when I died. He didn't get what I meant but I refused to say more. He then assigned me the job I have now." Botan explained her death to Hiei. She sighed deeply but then gave him a smile that was true. Hiei was silghtly taken back by how she managed the smile. Though she was in so much pain remembering her death she could still smile through it all and mean it too.

"Though they killed me and I was in emotional pain, I would never go back and change it if I had the chance. A life like theirs was no life at all for I wanted love. I didn't want to kill and if killing meant staying with them I didn't care to do so. Koenma never explained why he gave me this job but I didn't mind. Everyone thinks I'm just a poor innocent ferry woman who can't carry her own weight and they have to protect me and I allow them to do so for selfish reasons. I know me being selfish is amazing right? I do have much selfishness. I let them protect me because then I feel wanted...needed...loved. I feel everything I had never gotten in 20 years of real life." Botan said. Hiei was surprised by all this. The fox was right. She was hiding things from them and she was letting Hiei in.

"Onna why am I the only you've told me these things to?" Hiei asked. Botan smiled at him agian and he quickly made sure he didn't meet her gaze. He knew if he did he would only get caught again and he hated that feeling. He felt so valunerable in that position though he knew that Botan wouldn't ever hurt him. But he couldn't help but feel trapped when like that.

"Because you've seen these things and no one else has. You aren't going to give me sympathy or a shoulder to cry on. You just take it in and let me know the truth. I need the truth. I don't need a shoulder to cry on because that doesn't show me the love I know I need. I need truth and you're one of the only ones willing enough to give it and I like that. Thank you Hiei for listening to my story. I hope I didn't take up too much of your time. If I did I apologize." Botan said and stood up on the branch. She walked ot the edge and blanced there and turned back and smiled at Hiei. She was about 20 feet off the ground and she stepped off with a smile on her face and a scream of dleight filled the air. Hiei was down at the ground catching her within a second. She giggled and hopped onto her feet.

"Thank you again Hiei. If you ever want to talk to me you can. I won't judge." Botan smield at him again and walked off. Hiei wouldn't ever get peace from this woman would he? He didn't think he would. Hiei got back into his tree and went to sleep and had no dreams because of stress.

**Well that was the second chapter. Please tell me what you think. I'm also very proud of the first I'd like to mention again. I'm not as proud of the second but I know I did good. Please review. Thank you very much. Also the reason Botan stepped off the tree was to see if Hiei would catch her or not. You'll figure out later.**


	3. Hiei's painful experience

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of the characters**

It had been a restless nap for Hiei and when he woke up it was night time. He hopped out of his tree and went to do his usual routine. He went to check up on Yukina. He looked through her window and realized she was asleep so he couldn't check on her but she seemed to be fine. Hiei found a nice tree that suited him that was close to Yukina's bedroom and went to rest in there. Though he had just taken a nap this bit of the night was normal for him and normal was what he needed and he needed it bad. He wasn't tired but he did close his eyes to think. Now he knew something no one knew; another secret into the bag. He knew about Botan's death and no one, not even Koenma knew that. Hiei knew he was the only one she had told.

"I can't sleep Hiei." A voice whispered right next to him. Hiei's eyes shot open to reveal Botan sitting next to him on the branch. Once again he hadn't sensed her because he had gotten caught up into thought. She was a serious distraction for him now and it bothered him greatly. He couldn't even sense her anymore because he was lost in though. That hadn't ever happened to him before. He was contemplating maybe it wasn't him but...her?

"Do you mind if I stay here for a while?" Botan asked and Hiei shook his head. He wasn't too bothered by it because she wasnn't touching him or annoying him; the two things she used to do. She was silent and leaned against the tree a little ways away from him. The branch was rather large. Hiei looked at her and noticed she had her eyes closed in peace but she wasn't sleeping. Her arms were crossed over her chest and her legs were stretched out and crossed over each other. Her pink kimono was blowing gently in the wind and she inhaled the forest smell. The blue hair whipped all around her as a gust of wind hit the tree. A smile was caressing her face and her features were gentle. She was at peace for now and Hiei felt he could be too. He knew him and the Onna had a new connection with each other and for some odd reason he felt he could be calmer with her unlike when he was before.

Hiei was amazed at how quiet Botan had been staying. He hadn't ever heard her this quiet unless they were in grave danger and even then she wasn't this quiet. The silence didn't bother him at all. It was the fact that the hyper chipper Botan was the one creating the silence. Usually no matter where Hiei went he was met with sound and only when he was alone was their silence so it was very odd to be in silence while the most talkative person was sitting right next to him. Of course he wasn't going to stir up conversation; Hiei wasn't that kind of person. So he closed his eyes and enjoyed the freedom of silence and the joy of the herbal fragrance that the forest emitted. It was nice, he would admit, that he could sit in such comfortable silence with her. Though it was different it was enjoyable.

"Hiei...would you like me to take you to my secret spot? It's where I go to think and relax. Most of the time the group thinks I'm at work but for a good hour or so I'm at my thinking spot. I would like to show it to you if you want." Botan offered. Hiei was slightly stunned by the break in silence but quietly stood up and nodded his head to her question. Something was compelling him to go. Some outside force was shouting at him that there was something he would need to see and that it would be important to him later. Hiei couldn't quite place who it was telling him this but he decided that he needed to go with it. Botan whipped out her oar and they both sat upon it. She flew toward the barrier between the worlds and stopped right before it was hit. Hiei didn't know what was going on but Botan started talking.

"Okay this will seem a little odd what I'm about to do and it might be painful for a second but it's well worth it. Only I, Enma, and Koenma know of this place and now you will too. The thing is Enma and Koenma don't know that I've found it out. Let's keep that part a secret." Botan laughed lightly and Hiei stared at her like she was crazy. Then she stood up on the oar and held her hand out to Hiei. He declined and got up himself. He wasn't too sure of what they were doing but Botan seemed to be sure of it and, to what Hiei would claim as a twist of the mind, he was starting to trust her. She smiled at him and looked ahead. She placed out her hand and it looked like she was pretending to put her hand against a wall but she wasn't.

"Place your hand on here." Botan said and Hiei did. It was an odd feeling because they couldn't really see anything but felt it. Botan kept her hand there and then grabbed Hiei's other one. He looked surprised but he trusted her enough to where he would let her touch him. It was an odd feeling having her touch him but he stuck with it. She knew what she was doing.

"You should close your eyes Hiei. Keeping your eyes open during this trip could kill you if you're not strong enough. I did once and the pain was so immense that I couldn't move at all for at least a week. Please...don't keep your eyes open. I know what I'm talking about." Hiei didn't want to close his eyes but Botan sounded so desprate so he did. Then he felt a tug at his hand and felt the feeling of falling. He tensed up and soon they hit ground but it wasn't hard to hit.. It was acctually a very soft landing. Hiei then opened his eyes and looked around. It wasn't a place he had ever seen nor heard of.

"This is called the land of the three worlds. It is rather large and technically could be called a world inside the other three worlds. I know you've heard the stories of unicorns and dragons. Well this is where most were shunned to. There are many 'mythical' creatures here. You'd think it's girly but honestly this place is a hell hole. Its terrain is deadly if not walked right upon and the air is thick with toxins you wouldn't dream of...but I can stand it. I've grown accustomed to it and it's a lot like Makai. It also has deadly cretures but some are nice." Botan said. Hiei realized it was rather hard for him to breathe in the place. The air was thick with something that he knew if he breathed in too long would surely kill him. It seemed Botan realized this and she grabbed his hand and he breathed in quickly and realized he could breathe now.

"You're thinking about breathing in these toxins but you can't do that. Why is because if you think it, your body will respond and keep the toxins in. Right now I'm distracting you from it and I know you can breathe properly. In this place many laws are objected. This is a world of animals and no humans. Half humans are here of course. You may come out now Kei'tath." Botan called and a head popped out from behind a tree.

"This is a tri-breed. He has three different sides. He's part dragon, part unicorn, and part human." Botan explained as the Kei'tath came up. The tri-breed smiled at Hiei. Hiei didn't return the smile to which Kei'tath only smiled more.

"He's heard much about my friends and he feels fine with you being here along with me. Kei'tath explain yourself to him." Botan said to the creature. Kei'tath got closer to Hiei and the fire demon had to bite back a growl.

"I am a tri-breed like few here. My breed is called the Taki'aeras. I myself am a Taki'aera and it is a very low race here. Not so much shunned as just not looked as highly upon.I have heard you are Hiei the fire demon. You weild a dragon on your right arm that holds darkness and flame. How can this be?" Kei'tath asked. He got closer to Hiei and grasped his right arm. Hiei quickly pulled away but Botan placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. Hiei glared at the Taki'aera and kept a good distance from him.

"It is because I am demon and can weild this dragon upon my arm with power. A creature like you who hasn't been exposed to the other worlds would never understand it." Hiei sneered. He didn't like the creature and Kei'tath caught on and glared back at Hiei. He could care less if the tri-breed cared for his attitude or not.

"Kei'tath I just wished to show Hiei my thinking place. I hope I haven't disturbed you too much. I hope to see you again." Botan said and hugged the creature. Kei'tath smirked at Hiei and in an instant he was on the ground dead. Botan stared in horror and then glared at Hiei with tears in her eyes. She slapped Hiei across the face but Hiei did nothing. He could understand why Botan was mad and he knew he would have to explain to her why he did what he did.

"I trusted you this much and you went and killed my friend!" Botan cried, tears streaming down her face while she stared at the dead body of the Taki'aera.

"If he was such a friend then you have failed to notice his malicious behavior. He is a low life and was attempting to kill you for feed. He has a dagger in his right hand and was about to stab you. I just saved you from death. Now let us go." Hiei said. Botan started to walk to a tree that was a few feet ahead and Hiei followed. Botan grasped his hand and then tugged hard. Hiei hadn't closed his eyes though and was screaming and writhing in pain. He didn't close his eyes like Botan had warned and now he was seeing what she had seen.

All around him were souls reaching for him. These souls came from all worlds and wanted him to join them. They grasped at him and they were all tugging on his soul, trying to pull him back from leaving. The pain was more immense than anything he had ever felt and he thought he was going to be ripped to pieces if he didn't get out of there soon. The fall seemed to last forever and the whailing souls didn't help either. Their high pitched cries were burning his ears and stabbing his soul. Then he felt himself falling freely without all the hands grasping at him. The release of all that pain that fast knocked him out and about an hour later he awoke in a bed. He looked around and hadn't an idea where he was but he smelt good food. He tried to get up but realized that even though the souls weren't grasping for him he was still in pain. He mustered up all his energy and looked down at his body. Though he had on his clothing he could feel the bruises and cuts . The souls had grabbed more than just his soul.

"I told you to close your eyes. I healed all the wounds I could but you're going to be in pain a while. Here's some food. I'll give it to you since you can't move." Botan was speaking to him all business like. She sounded cold and hurt. She brought of the food and lifted him. The process of feeding him was over quick and she left without another word. She was rather angry with him for killing her friend but she was more so sad than anything. She was sad that she was wanted dead again like she was when she was alive. She felt so stupid for trusting a creature she didn't even really know about.

1 hour later

Hiei had slept again and when he woke he found he could walk and move about though it was a slow pace. His chest still stung and it hurt slightly to breathe so he could only assume that was where his soul was; in his chest. Slowly he made his way to the closed door and grasped the door handle. It was hard to just do that but he managed and opened the door. Though Hiei was demon the wounds he recived were deep. They were deeper than any demon could make to him without killing him. He walked out of the door and started to walk a little faster but it felt like his legs were going to break off if he did. When he managed to reach the living room of Botan's apartment he saw her on the couch and she was crying. It wasn't loud but her head was in her hands and her elbows were resting on her knees.

"Onna..." Hiei said quietly. Botan quickly looked up at him and wiped away her eyes and hurried over to him. She seemed surprised that he could walk. The ferry girl wrapped her arm around his shoulders and slowly led him to the couch she had just been on. She forced him to lay down and then got on her knees beside the couch.

"Hiei I'm going to try to heal your wounds a little more. I'm going to need to take off your shirt to heal them." Botan told him. She helped Hiei get off his shirt since he was rather weak at the moment. There were many bruises and healed cuts over his body but the deepest ones were near the middle of his chest where his soul laid. Botan closed her eyes and placed her hands over the middle of his chest where all the cuts were deepest. When she channeled her energy thought it wasn't the white magic Hiei though he would see. It was a light blue color with a gold aura around the blue. Hiei looked down and realized the cuts and bruises weren't healing anymore than they already were. He couldn't imagine that her healing wasn't working but he felt like he was getting lighter.

"What...are you doing to me?" Hiei breathed out. Botan didn't answer him and continued what she was doing. After a few minutes she took her hands off him. She looked tired but she looked happy as well. When Hiei looked down at his body the cuts and bruises were still there. He was confused as to what she did because he knew she was healing something. Maybe she was healing fractured veins or something.

"Onna, what did you do to me?" Hiei asked after looking himself over.

"Since I had already healed most of your cuts and lessened your bruises I couldn't do much to them but it wasn't just your physical body that had been damaged. Since the dead was reaching for your soul they had managed to grab it and it would scratch it and slightly tear it in some places. Since that could litterally kill more than your body I knew I had to heal it but my white magic can't heal souls, only wounds upon a body. So instead I channeled some white magic with a little of my soul into yours." Botan said. Hiei sat up and realized he could move with ease. Slowly he touched the spot she had healed him at and stared at it with shock. She had given up some of her soul for him. Then he looked at her in shock.

"Don't worry Hiei. It didn't hurt me too much. I mean I've never done that before but I did know how. I still have a lot of my soul left in me but Hiei...in exchange for my soul I had to take a tiny portion of yours. Don't worry about that too much either. You still have your soul it's just since my soul has healing magic within it, it healed yours. So technically now we're kind of soul bound. It's not like one would with a mate though. It's just if you kill me then both part of your soul and my entire one disappears, thus allowing the cuts in your to come back because mine has to come out of yours to die. This process though will bring you to the brink of insanity and death and then you'll probably kill yourself. So as long as neither of us dies we'll be fine." Botan said all of this with ease but this scared Hiei a little. Of course even if he didn't have her soul in him he would protect her but now they had a soul contract that they must protect each other.

"Onna, why would you do such a thing for me?" Hiei still couldn't believe she would do such a thing for him. Now they had a much deeper connection than just secrets. Botan smiled at him in such a meaningful way that Hiei glanced at her eyes and for once was happy to get frozen by them, but the words she that came out of her mouth were going to freeze him more.

"Because you're worth it Hiei." Botan said gently. She broke his gaze and stood up, going to go eat to gather up her energy. No one had ever said that to Hiei before. He was worth her soul? Though he didn't believe it she seemed to. He pushed himself off the couch and went into the kitchen as well because though he was hungry he also wanted to know more.

**Well that's the end of chapter three. I noticed that I really like this story and I'm keeping up with it. I know why though. My family got a new computer and so I only have one story going on this and it's this one! Yay! **


	4. An explanation of trust

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters**

"Hiei what would you like to eat?" Botan asked without even turning around to see that Hiei had entered the kitchen. He sat down at the table and said ntohing. He never had preferences about what he liked to eat so Botan scattered about the kitchen gathering ingredients for a meal. It seemed to Hiei, from watching Kurama's mother cook, she was making sandwiches. Hiei didn't mind too much though for he was just hungry.

"I'm going to make you a ham and cheese sandwich and just ham for myself, okay Hiei?" Botan said while making the sandwiches. Hiei just grunted in reply and sat there. Then Botan finished and then put them on plates. She set one in front of Hiei and then sat on the other side of the table and set one of the plates in front of her. Before Hiei would have been scared to eat her food but with the soup he had in the morning and that fact he was starving he bit into the sandwich. It was surprisingly good and Botan started to eat hers too.

"Anymore questions for me Hiei? Lately you've been asking plently of questions that I don't mind answering." Botan asked him. Hiei did have a ton of questions but he didn't feel like asking them.

"I know you're still wondering why I chose you. I also know that you think my reasoning for chosing you wasn't just what I said and you're right. That was only a part of it. There are many reasons I've chosen you but some of them right now I can barely trust with myself so I can not tell them to you yet. I know I said I trust you and believe me I do but there are still some things that only I know about and you'll find out later on." Botan said. So maybe Hiei didn't have to ask at all because the one main question he was going to ask Botan just answered.

"Hiei is there anything you want to tell me?" Botan wasn't asking him to trust her she was just asking if he wanted to. Hiei knew they were closer than ever but he didn't want to break down his walls so he shook his head. She smiled at him though, without sadness behind it. She was willing to wait until he was ready to tell her anything and so when he didn't it didn't sadden her because she knew in time he would tell her. Hiei also knew this and knew it to be true as well.

"You aren't in too much pain anymore are you?" Botan finished off her sandwich and Hiei shook his head to her question.

"Well good. I'm going to go take a shower. You can after I do because Hiei I'm not going to lie...you need one. I'm going to call up Kurama and ask if he can loan you some clothes for now because the ones you're wearing seriously need some washing." Botan giggled at that and went and set her plate down in the sink. then she noticed Hiei was done and she set his plate in the sink as well. Then she went to the phone and dialed in Kurama's number.

"Hey Kurama!" Botan said into the phone, her unusally believable chipper voice back to talk with an unknowing friend.

_"Hey Botan. What are you up to?"_ Hiei could hear Kurama on the other line and so he listened to him. (Kurama talking will be in italics.)

"Well I have Hiei over here and I'm ordering him to take a shower and his clothes need a good wash too. So I was wondering if you could come by and drop some clothes off for our fire demon friend. Is that okay?" Botan smiled while talking because she heard Hiei growl because she said she was ordering him to do something.

_"Sure I don't mind doing that but might I ask why Hiei is at your apartment?"_ Hiei glared at the phone because after Kurama said that he chuckled. Then Hiei caught Botan blushing because she knew what the fox was implying.

"Kurama it is not that! Get your mind out of the gutter!" Botan laughed to him, "But Hiei...well he had an encounter with..." Botan didn't finsih her sentence because she saw Hiei telling her not to.

_"He had an encounter with what, Botan?" _Kurama now sounded worried and Botan quickly turned her attention back to the phone.

"Ah it wasn't much. If Hiei wants to tell you he will. It's not my place to tell. But when you come over I'll probably be in the shower so Hiei will get the door. Hey you can stay over here and hang out with us for a while. That would be good." Botan's suggestion more so sounded like a friend trying to be nice than a real suggestion of interest.

_"Sure Botan. I would love to. I'll talk to you soon. Bye Botan."_

"See you soon Kurama, bye." Botan then hung up the phone and turned to Hiei.

"If you want to tell Kurama go ahead. I'm going to go take a shower. If he comes before I'm out then please answer the door." Botan said and walked off toward her room to grab some clothing. Hiei went to the couch and sat down. He knew how to work the television but he didn't feel like watching it at the moment. By the looks of it Botan didn't use it much either. It was covered in dust. Maybe she only cleaned it and used it when he friends were over because Hiei had been here before and everything was neat and tidy.

Hiei heard the shower turn on and the sound of running water was somehow soothing to him. He leaned against the couch and closed his eyes with his head leaned back. He finally had some peace for a little bit. Not that he minded the company of Botan, though he'd never admit that to anyone, but he needed some quiet without anyone around. It was a few minutes later that the doorbell rang. Well at least he got some momentary peace. Hiei got up off the couch and answered the door. It was of course Kurama with some clothing in his hands. Hiei was about to let the fox in until he noticed the smirk gracing his lips.

"What are you smirking at, fox?" Hiei asked, annoyed. Kurama pushed past him and Hiei shut the door. He was chuckling to himself while he set the clothing down and now Hiei was very confused. He sat back down on the couch and Kurama sat down too, chuckling more.

"The fact that you're shirt is on the floor makes me question why you were really here." Kurama laughed lightly. Hiei then looked down and noticed he didn't have his shirt on. Hiei left the shirt on the ground but Kurama kept laughing.

"What now?" Hiei was now fairly annoyed at Kurama.

"Well let's see. Botan is in the shower, you were missing your shirt and the imprints on the couch looks like someone was laying here." Kurama found the anger in Hiei's eyes rather amusing.

"We did nothing Fox. She was healing me." Hiei said. Then Kurama turned serious. He had almost forgotten Botan said Hiei had an encounter with something. Then Kurama noted the bruises and cuts on Hiei's chest and then realized the deepest cuts were in the middle of Hiei's chest. Something wanted something that was inside of the fire demon.

"What happened Hiei? Where were you that this could have happened?" Kurama was rather worried about his best friend. He knew Hiei could avoid a lot of thing but this looked like Hiei hadn't even tried to avoid that damage. Hiei decided he would keep the place a secret since Botan trusted him to.

"I'm not going to tell you where we were because she has trusted me not to but she warned me and I didn't listen. When we reached where we were the Onna told me to close my eyes before we jumped through. When we entered I did but when we were leaving I forgot to." Hiei said.

"Well what caused you to get all these scars? What was it she didn't want you to see?" Kurama had to know what happened.

"It wasn't that I didn't want him to see something...but if he kept his eyes open the pain would be immense." Botan said. They didn't even hear her come out of the bathroom. She walked over and sat down on the couch beside Hiei and Kurama. She was in the middle.

"What was it Botan?" He asked. Botan glanced at Hiei as if to ask if she could tell Kurama. Hiei nodded his head and she smiled at him.

"I didn't want Hiei to see the lost souls." Botan said. Kurama didn't understand what she meant.

"You see if when you open your eyes while you're falling though the barrier of it then you get to see all the souls who are stuck in limbo." Botan said. Kurama didn't understand. They had all kept their eyes open while crossing any barriers and never saw any souls.

"Where were you?"

"I showed him the land of the three worlds. It is a world of it's own. It is the spot where the three worlds touch. That's where most mythical creatures such as dragons and unicorns were banished to. But that is also where the souls of limbo go. When you keep your eyes open during the trip of passing through the barrier the souls see that you're still alive and try to pull out your soul so you join them in limbo. It is very painful and if they reach and pull out your soul then you will never be out of limbo. Since Hiei is a demon then it is harder for the souls to grab him. They did cut deep and they reached his soul and scratched it and tore it open a little." Botan said. Kurama was very shocked.

"Well what's going to happen to his soul now?" This was the part that was a little harder to explain. Hiei nodded his head to Botan to let her know that it was okay to tell Kurama.

"Well I healed Hiei's soul." Kurama looked utterly confused and Botan knew this was going to get akward, " Well since my white magic can't heal souls fully I had to transfer some of my soul to Hiei along with white magic. So now Hiei has a piece of my soul in him."

"So does that mean your soul is smaller?" This was one of the rare times in Kurama's life that he was confused.

"No, in exchange for some of my soul I had to take a little of Hiei's." This was getting harder and harder for the ferry girl to explain.

"So you both have a bit of each other's soul?" Botan nodded her head, "Then what if one of you dies?"

"Well let's say I die first. The part of my soul in Hiei's will be ripped out and it will be a very painful experience. Since I have some of Hiei's soul in me it dies with me. Then Hiei would only have half a soul to live with and the pain of that is so immense that is causes the one who hasn't died to reach the brink of insanity and kill themselves to get rid of the pain." Botan explained. Kurama turned his head to Hie to find the fire demon looking away.

"So you're both soul bound now?" Kurama asked. They both nodded their heads. Then Botan stood up and both ex-convicts looked at her.

"Hiei now you need to go shower. Do you know how to work a shower?" Botan asked. Hiei nodded his head and stood up. He grabbed the clothing Kurama had brought him and went into the bathroom.

"The towles are in the linen closet!" Botan shouted to Hiei. She heard him open the closet and grab one. Then she sat down beisde Kurama and smiled. It was a slightly akward silence, which had never really occured between the two of them.

"Kurama...I'm sorry for not trusting you with what I-" Kurama cut her off by shaking his head with a smile. Then he glanced toward the bathroom and looked back at Botan.

"Hiei needs this and I know he's the right person to trust. You have nothing to be sorry about because I know in time you'll show us your real side. You shoudn't be ashamed of your other side though Botan." Kurama said. Botan looked away while blushing.

"I know I shouldn't be but everyone's so used to the other side of me." Botan said. Kurama nodded his head in understanding. Everyone had more than one side but with Botan she never really showed it.

"So what all does Hiei know?"

"A lot more than anyone else. He's the only one other than myself that knows how I died. Not even Koenma knows how I died and I've refused to tell him and so he stopped asking me." Botan said, "But he hasn't started to trust me yet. I don't mind too much because I know in time he will. I've been in his position before."

"You can trust that Hiei will trust you later on. He slowly began to trust me as I trusted him. I know he'll trust you. Probably more than he does with anyone else since you've trusted him so well. I know you're pulling him out of his shell." Kurama then heard the shower turn off and he smiled at Botan. Hiei walked out of the bathroom in loose fitting black pants much like his own and a dark blue sleeveles shirt. He sat down on the couch and Botan went to put his clothing in the washer. That left Kurama and Hiei to themselves.

"She trusts you very much Hiei. I don't mean to push you but you should trust her to. Botan won't hurt you." Kurama said. Hiei remembered Botan slapping him but he knew that was because of anger and she didn't mean anything by it. He also knew that she wouldn't ever hurt him. He was just afraid that he was wrong.

"I don't want to have to build walls again. I might be wrong with trusting her." Hiei sounded slightly hurt remembering his past. Kurama sighed, knowing that this was hard for him.

"You wouldn't be wrong. Botan wants to trust you with her secrets. She wouldn't if she wanted to hurt you. Hiei...Botan sees the same thing in you that I saw. She sees a good person. A trustworthy person...what do you see with her?" Kurama knew this would be hard for Hiei to answer.

"I don't know what I see in her. There's so much to see." Hiei said. Kurama knew that meant that Hiei saw greatness in Botan. With a smile she came back into the room and sat down. The look in Botan's eyes said that she was concentrating on something.

"Hiei...since I trust you then you should know that I love you." Botan didn't dare look Hiei in the eyes. She was staring forward at the black screen of the television. Hiei looked at Kurama and he was smiling sadly at Hiei. The fire demon was so shocked and confused that he stood up and left her apartment. Kurama looked at Botan and noticed tears in her eyes but a smile was on her face. She looked at Kurama.

"Well at least now he knows." She breathed in deeply and wiped away her tears. The smile on her face was an ironic and depressed one. Kurama's heart ached for Botan. She was in such pain but yet she smiled through it.

"We're having a get together at Genkai's tomorrow. Please tell Hiei that Yukina wishes to see him." Botan said and stood up. Kurama stood too and placed a hand on Botan's shoulder. When Botan looked him in the eyes he realized what Hiei was talking about when he said got frozen by them. The fox felt as if he couldn't move. His breathing was caught in his throat as he stared Botan in the eyes.

"I've been through worse Kurama. It's okay. I'll move on. Don't worry about me. I have to clean though and tell Koenma that we're having a get together so you'll have to go." Botan said. Kurama nodded his head and left without a word. As soon as the door shut the tears fell out of Botan's eyes. She leaned herself against the door and slid down while sobbing into her hands. The cries, though quiet, were ear piercing if heard by anyone.

**Well that was chapter four. I'm happy that I'm finishing things so fast. I wrote this in a day but it took hours. I'm kind of proud of it and I know it's a little early for Botan to be confessing her love but I promise there will be many more chapters.**


	5. Shown pain

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of it's characters**

"Koenma, we're having a get together at Genkai's tomorrow and I was wondering if you would like to come to it since you are the one that managed to get us all together." Botan said. Koenma looked up from the papers he was working on and smiled at Botan. He seemed in a rather good mood today and so that made Botan feel a little better.

"Well I do have a lot of paper work to do but sure. I need a break from work anyways. So when is it tomorrow?" Koenma asked. Botan was glad that her boss was coming. Though sometimes he could be a little hard on people he could also be fun at parties.

"I guess it's around 4 or 5 and ends whenever you're about to pass out I guess." Botan smiled at her boss. He nodded his head and went back to his paper stamping. She left his office and went back home. The only reason she didn't have work is because she had been given a year long vacation. Though sometimes the nights were lonely Botan was glad to be off work. The night was silent as she flew back home and all she could think about was how stupid she felt for letting Hiei know she loved him.

When she reached home she called Yukina and told her about the get together and of course the ice demon agreed. Then Botan changed into her pajamas and went into bed. She was very tired and upset so sleeping wasn't hard to reach but dreams were. Her sleep was restless and she continued waking up in the middle of the night. Finally she heard her alarm go off and it was 11:00 and she was going to go help Yukina cook for the party. Slowly the sleepy ferry girl pulled herself from the bed and went to the shower. When she came out she was in jeans and a tank top. Having a party in summer was rather fun but she didn't know how much fun she would be able to have considering Hiei might be there.

After Botan ate she got on her oar and flew over to Genkai's house. Her flying was slow and sleep-like but she reached Genkai's house with ease. When she landed she reached the door and opened it. Yukina walked over to her and noted her face and looked worried. She rushed over to Botan and hugged her.

"Botan, what happened? You look very tired. Could you not sleep?" Yukina asked. Talk of sleep made Botan yawn and rub her eyes. She smiled at the ice demon and shook her head.

"No I couldn't but I want to be here at this party and I'm willing to help. I'll be fine. I just need some sugar and water." Botan smiled more and Yukina, though unsure, nodded her head. Both women went into the kitchen and started to cook a large meal for when everyone was to arrive. Then they heard the doorbell and Botan said she'd keep cooking while Yukina answered it. When the ice demon came back in tow with her was Kurama and Hiei. The ferry girl met the gaze of the fox but then looked down before she met the gaze of Hiei. Both Yukina and Kurama noticed this. Kurama knew why though and Yukina didn't.

"Yukina I'll help Botan cook. Why don't you and Hiei catch up on things." Kurama suggested. Yukina tried to decline but somehow Kurama talked her into it. As soon as the two siblings left to the living room the silence killed. Kurama didn't know what to say but he knew having Hiei in the same room as Botan after what happened was not good. Hiei hadn't said anything about what happened to the fox and so he didn't ask.

"So how are you going to take this? You look rather tired so I'm assuming it was a very restless night." Kurama said while stirring something in a pot. Botan sighed and leaned against the counter, ceasing her chopping of veggies and looked Kurama in the eyes. He met her gaze and saw true sadness. He had only seen this a few times before and she had the deepest of all. She managed a smile though and Kurama had to bite his lip from saying anything because such a smile with that much sadness should never be allowed. He had to avert his gaze or else he might begin crying for it was to painful to see Botan, his friend, in such pain.

"The only thing I can do is move on. I have all the time in the world, I mean I am dead." Botan chuckled in slight irony. She turned around and started chopping again. Kurama added some noodles to a pot and started to boil it. Then he stood beside Botan and leaned against the counter. Right now all he could be for her is a shoulder to lean on and he was doing his best.

"You know...that was the first time I told anyone that. I've never been in love before now and I see why so many people hate love. Honestly I can say right now I do hate it. Sometimes it makes me wish I hadn't any emotions...because sometimes having emotions seem like a waste of time." Kurama gasped slightly. The most emotional person he knew had just said something that he thought he would never hear. She sounded almost like Hiei...but different. This was much more meaningful, unlike Hiei who just said it because he wanted to look strong. Botan said it because she was strong but didn't want to be

"Botan...I can't speak for Hiei's emotions and I know you want the truth and I'm going to give it to you. It may hurt and it may not but still you deserve it. Hiei isn't unemotional, as much as he tries to be, and he may not love you. He may never even trust you." Kurama said. He didn't want to hurt his friend but she needed the truth and needed it straight out. He looked at Botan and saw her nodding her head as she finished chopping. She then put the veggies into a bowl and made a salad. Then she stirred the noodles. She was making spaghetti for everyone who was coming over. It was now 1:00 pm and they had three hours until everyone came over. They had just finished making the food and Botan placed things over it to make sure it stayed hot.

"Let's go sit down in the dinning room. I don't want to stand any longer." Botan said. They entered a door that lead to the dinning room and Botan sat down and Kurama sat down beside her. No words were said for a while but neither minded. They knew that the topic they were on was hard to deal with.

"I know Hiei might never love me. I took that into realization as soon as I knew I loved him. Of course I hoped that he would being to surface feelings for me but hope is what makes love hurt even more." Botan laughed lightly but it wasn't happy. Kurama didn't say anything. He stood up and hugged Botan and then patted her head and left toward the living room. She didn't mind the silence and lonliness. The ferry girl probably needed it more than anything. Gently she laid her head down onto the cool glass of the table and closed her eyes. A big sigh escaped her lips and her breath fogged the glass for a minute and then it disappeared.

The blue haired woman just sat there for a long time. Yukina never came in and nor did Kurama, but she was fine with that. The peace from people was doing her some good at the moment. The time that passed was unknown to Botan but she could feeling her legs starting to cramp and her back starting to hurt from being in that position for so long. Then the dinning room door opened slowly and Yukina's head popped in. The ferry girl didn't move though and Yukina went and sat in a chair beside Botan. In time the ice demon knew her best friend would tell her what was wrong.

"Are you going to come into the living room? It's 10 till four. The food is ready and everything and Shizuru and Keiko arrived. Yusuke should be coming soon with Kuzuma and Koenma said he would be running a little late. When you're ready Botan, you can come and visit." Yukina then grasped her friend's hand and squeezed it comfortingly. The ice demon left the room and Botan stood up. Her knee joints popped loudly and her back ached. Her right cheek was freezing and her neck was sore but she walked out into the living room and plastered a smile upon her face. Just as she walked out Yusuke and Kuwabara walked in.

"Hey Yusuke." Botan smiled at the ex-detective and he went over and hugged her. Then he stood beside Keiko. Botan avoided her gaze with Hiei and said hello to everyone. They all headed to the dinning room where, while everyone wasn't paying attention Yukina set up, the food was ready. They all sat down and then the doorbell rang. Yukina went and got it and then came back with Koenma. He sat down and they all ate in a comfortable silence. Hiei was all the way across the table from Botan and she was rather glad that they didn't have that akward aura around them. Dinner was finished silently and they all went to the living room and began to mingle.

"So Botan what have you been up to?" Yusuke asked Botan as they sat on the couch. Keiko was talking with Yukina and everyone was mingling. Botan bit back a sigh and smiled at her best friend. Yukina was her other best friend but Yusuke was her first best friend.

"Oh nothing much. Just getting to know my friends better and things like that." Botan said. Yusuke wiggled his eyebrows in suggestion to what she said. The blank stare she gave him made him laugh lightly and she laughed too.

"So have you found yourself a little someone to smooch upon?" Yusuke winked at her and Botan had to giggle at his face. It was rather amusing but then she remembered telling Hiei that she loved him and she sighed sadly. In just a fourth of a second Yusuke's face chaged from humorous to serious and worried. Botan looked at him and sadly smiled. This was not a good sign to the ex-detective.

"Well... I thought I did but I guess he doesn't feel the same because when I told him he just left. I'll be fine though Yusuke. Like they all say 'love hurts' and it truly does." Botan sighed sadly. Yusuke hugged Botan and smiled at her. He knew this was her battle and he couldn't help her. He got up and walked over to mingle with Kuwabara and Yukina and all of them. Kurama then sat beside Botan but she stood up. She avoided the fox's eyes and Kurama looked slightly saddened.

"I know everyone wants to help but right now I'm not ready to let it out. I'm going for a walk. I'll be back but I don't know when." Botan said and walked out the door. The ex-convict walked over to the fire demon with much anger. Hiei didn't even open his eyes and Kurama leaned against the wall. Neither wanted to have the conversation out loud so Hiei made a mental connection with the Fox. (Kurama is in _italics_ and Hiei is in **bold**.)

_Do you have any idea how much pain she's in?_

**Yes I do but honestly Fox I don't know what to do. I've hurt a lot of people...**

_Yeah but standing there will do nothing! You could at least talk to her! She trusted you and you just blow her off like this!_

**Well like she said to the detective 'love hurts' and she's right.**

_Do you even hold feeling's for her? Do you care if she's in pain?_

**I do care if she's in pain but I don't know what the kind of feelings I hold for her are. I don't want to get hurt again and with how forward it was it scared me and if you tell anyone that I'll kill you.**

_Then tell her that! Tell her that you're confused! She obviously loves you enough to let your rejection hurt her...and if you don't love her back you had better tell her now or __**I'll**__ kill you._ Then the connection was cut by Kurama. It wasn't that he loved to have the last say but he knew in this case he needed to have the last say or else Hiei wouldn't get what he was saying.

The fire demon growled and pushed himself from the wall. He knew what the Fox had said was true and he knew he'd have to face Botan again at some point or another. The fire demon went out the door and Kurama walked over to mingle. Kurama informed everyone of the leaving of both of them and Yukina and Yusuke stared at the door in sorrow for they knew how much pain their best friend was in.

**Well that is all for this chapter. Sorry it was a little short but the next one should be longer. Well until I get the next chapter started (which should be soon) please read and review!**


	6. A new Revelation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho**

Botan walked out of the house and into the forest by Genkai's house. A nice walk would do her some good. She couldn't stand being in that house and trying to have a normal conversation with people. The one thing stuck on Botan's mind was the fact that Hiei just up and left without a word. She knew he was anti-social but she figured he had a little heart in him. Maybe she was wrong. The thought brought tears to the ferry girl's eyes. She wanted to believe Hiei had a heart but it was so hard when he didn't show it. She aimlessly walked around alone but unbeknownst to her she was being followed.

Hiei was jumping tree to tree following her. He was very silent and he knew she didn't know he was there. The fire demon didn't want to startle her so he would wait utnil she found a place to sit before talking with her. Not only that but he didn't know if he was ready to talk. Hiei wasn't one to know the feelings of love. Not sibling love, he knew that, but romantic love. He had never felt it before so how was he supposed to know if that was what he felt for Botan? Maybe he felt just a deep connection like he did with his sister. Then again he had heard the ferry girl and the fox talking in the kitchen and Botan did say she hadn't ever loved someone before so how did she know what it felt like? How was she so sure it was love?

Finally finding a place to sit, Botan sighed and plopped down beside the tree trunk and twiddled with the grass in thought. How long would it be before she could face Hiei again? She hated not being able to talk to him. _'Stupid girl! Why'd you have to go and ruin a perfect relationship?!'_ Botan was yelling at herself. She ripped the grass out of the ground and shredded it up into pieces and threw it to the earth in rage but the tears came. She knew the relationship she would have with Hiei would never be the same. Though she had tears in her eyes they refused to spill.

Hiei halted when Botan sat down and he watched her for a little bit. He watched as she ripped up grass and suddenly the smell of salt filled his nose. She was crying...or almost crying. As badly as the fire demon wanted to he wouldn't pry her mind for her thoughts. He would admit he was rather sad not having her talk to him at all like she would normally do. Hiei was rather angry at himself for how he left her in her state last night but he was afraid. For the first time in his life he was really afraid and he was scared he lost one of the closest people to him. She trusted him with everything, even her love, and he gave her a harsh rejection. Then the sudden smell of tears expanded and the sound of sobbing broke the silence. Botan was crying and Hiei knew it was because of him.

He leapt from the tree with silence and was by her side quickly but she never looked up and never stopped sobbing. The ferry girl must not have known he was there. Hiei didn't quite know what to do since he wasn't the best at comforting people. He leaned down and akwardly wrapped his arms around Botan. Her sobbing slowed and then ceased and her head titled to look him in the eyes. Quickly she looked away with a blush and her heart racing. It was not her eyes that held all the power every time for Hiei's eyes were filled to the brim with emotion at that second.

"What are you doing here, Hiei?" Botan asked while still in his grasp. Hiei shifted and set her into his lap and held her close. He didn't know if you could call the feeling in his heart love but it had many instincts and this is what he was told to do. The reaction he recieved when placing Botan in his lap pleased him. Botan gasped and blushed but hid her head in his chest. His heart was pounding 20 miles a minute...well it felt like it at least. She could hear his heart and smiled. Now she knew he really felt something for her. Though she looked calm her heart was beating just as fast as the one who was holding her.

"You're upset with me." Hiei stated matter-of-factly. Botan smiled gently and grasped his shirt and started messing with it.

"I am...but you're fixing it." Botan blushed while saying the last part. Hiei smiled a small smile and started to mess with her hair in his fingers. Maybe the feeling he had in his heart was love. He would find out with time but he knew that whatever the feeling was, when Botan was upset with him it caused him pain. It would make his heart constrict tightly and his breathing would grow weak when he saw her upset.

"What's the feeling of love?" Hiei asked after a little bit of silence. Botan sat in thought for a moment to try and come up with a good answer. She twisted the bit of shirt in her hands and thought hard about his question.

"Well...it's something you feel for another person. It's where you don't want them to be in pain but when they cause you anger you just want to grab them and choke them...and then when the thought hits your head you calm down and you know you could never do that to them. Then you want to just grab them and kiss them so that they lose their anger as well. It's not a feeling that can really be explained...you just know after a while." Botan tried her best to explain. It confused Hiei a little as to why you would want to choke someone and then want to kiss them afterward.

"So you feel like that toward me?" Botan nodded her head and snuggled closer to Hiei. He placed a hand on her shoulder and one on her outer thigh and pulled her closer to him and breathed in her scent. Now Hiei was almost positive it was love he felt for her. His fingers played with the ends of her hair and she sighed in contentment.

"I love you Hiei." Botan mumbled and then realized what she said and blushed and was about to pull back until Hiei held her still. If there was any time to let her know his feelings for her it was now. She heard him take in a deep breath and her heart began to beat faster and so did his.

"I love you too Botan." Hiei whispered to her and kissed the top of her head. Botan gasped and wrapped her arms around his neck while tears streamed down her face. She was so happy to finally hear him say those words. Not only that but he said them along with her name. Hiei just held her close and it felt right to him. He knew this was meant to be for the both of them and a revelation hit him. How could he not have seen it and Botan did like she did with many things? He chuckled and Botan pulled back with a confused face. Maybe she hadn't gotten it and the revelation hit him first.

"This is why you could catch me so easily in your eyes," Hiei said while looking her straight in the eyes. Botan held his gaze and each gaze was intense but loving. "The reason you could hold me still was because I wanted to be held still. I wanted you to capture me."

Botan smiled at him and hugged him close in a very gentle loving hug. With the look in her eyes he knew he hadn't figured it out before her. That was fine by him. He could learn many things with his ferry girl and she could learn much from him. They sat there just holding each other like new lovers always do as the forest leaves floated around them.

**Well I'm sorry it was so short but my computer is going to be fixed and I had to type this chapter fast before I lost it. Well this isn't the last chapter and I hope you continue to read.**


	7. Amusment in embarrassment

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakuro or any of its characters**

"Do you think we should go find them?" Yusuke whispered to Kurama. The fox nodded his head and they gathered up the group. It had been a few hours after the two had left and they still hadn't come back. Everyone was getting worried and they were now going to have a search party. The group sat down and started to devise a plan on how to search.

"Okay, Yukina I wish for you and Keiko to stay here with Genkai. I'm not saying you're weak but Yusuke doesn't want you getting hurt Keiko and Yukina, you could get kidnapped for your tears. Shizuru you can come with me and Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Koenma will go out on their own and search." Kurama said. Everyone agreed and the three left at home siad they would call if the two came back. Then the search party was assembled and outside. They all went seperate ways except for Kurama and Shizuru.

"I wonder where they could be? Do you think they'd be in a tree?" Shizuru asked and Kurama nodded his head. While they were walking Kurama kept his eyes in the trees for anything black, pink, blue, or anything that didn't belong in a tree. Shizuru kept her eyes near the ground in search of them. Then they stopped after half an hour of walking because Shizuru held out her arm and stopped Kurama. He ran into her arm with his gut and let out an 'oof' sound and then followed her gaze. It was at the base of a tree and he smiled at the sight.

"Well at least we know what they've been doing the entire time." Shizuru laughed and Kurama couldn't help but let out a chuckle to her implication. There in front of the two was Hiei and Botan asleep at the base of a tree. Hiei's back was against the tree and his legs laid out. Botan sat between his legs and was leaning against his chest, both sleeping soundly. Some leaves had fallen on the two and a little bit of dirt. The bottom of both of their clothing was dirty and the fact that some twigs and leaves found their way into the couple's hair only added to the effect of cuteness. What awed Kurama and Shizuru most is that with all that was just described it made the two look ancient. It was quite a beautiful sight for one to see.

"They look so peaceful, as if they could lay there forever." Shizuru said after a while of staring at them.

"It _looks_ like they've been laying there forever." Kurama commented and Shizuru nodded her head. The couple looked a little like a painted statue that had been made centuries ago and left to rot but magically stayed in perfect condition.

"Should we wake them?" Shizuru asked and Kurama shook his head. Hiei was parobably awake at that very moment but didn't want to disturb his soon to be mate. The fox couldn't bring himself to pull the two out of their slumber and turned on his heel and left. Shizuru followed and when they reached home they found Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Koenma there. They told them what was to be told. That Botan and Hiei were fine and alive. That eased the tension in the room and all went back to normal.

As soon as Hiei felt the two leave he opened his eyes and looked down at Botan in his arms. She was still sound asleep and, without shifting too much, Hiei had her bridal style in his arms and was carrying her back to her apartment. When he reached it though he realized he didn't have her key. Then a groan was heard and the fire demon looked down to find Botan staring back at him. He smiled just barely and she smiled back.

"It's under the plant Kurama left for me when I bought the house. It won't bite you." Botan yawned out and Hiei set her on the ground gently and she leaned against the wall, snuggling agianst it slightly, and he picked up the key and opened the door. After placing the key back to its home, Hiei lifted Botan again and carried her to her bedroom. He set her gently on the bed and laid down beside her. He pulled her close and felt her yawn slightly. Though he badly wanted to mark her he also wanted her fully awake during it. Not only that but she seemed rather tired. He heard her sigh in contentment and within minutes she was alseep again. He stared down at her with a smile just barely gracing his lips.

Reaching behind her head he gently pulled the pony tail holder from her hair. As soon as he did her hair fell over her shoulders and finally rested all over the top half of her upper torso. It was a beautiful sight for him to see. She looked angelic and innocent at that moment in sleep and Hiei couldn't help but wonder if that's what he looked like when he slept. Botan snuggled up to him, her hands resting on his chest while she lay on her side and him on his. The feeling in Hiei's chest was slowly becoming normal to him. At first it was very foreign and unusal but slowly it was resting itself deep inside his heart.

"Are you not tired, Hiei?" Botan asked while slowly opening her eyes. She looked up at Hiei and he was looking down at her. She blushed but continued to stare at him. He gave the smallest of smiles to her and she returned it.

"I'm not but you may continue to sleep." Hiei responded. Botan laughed gently and shook her head. Shifting slightly, the ferry girl sat up and Hiei sat up with her. She moved so that she was sitting beside him and rested her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her waist and rested his head upon her own. There was a comfortable silence filling the room as the new couple rested.

"Hiei...I have a question." Botan paused and Hiei nodded his head for her to continue. "Why did you go looking for me?"

"Because the fox made me," Hiei paused and he could smell the hint of salt and knew he should continue, " But I'm glad he did." Then he heard Botan sigh happily and he couldn't help but pull her closer. She was one of the few he could please easily by just being him and it intoxicated him.

"Hiei..." Hiei heard the nervousness in her voice and looked at her. She was blushing a deep hue of crimson and her eyes were averted somewhere in the room that wasn't in his direction. He placed two fingers under her chin and gently forced her to look at him. This caused her blush to become deeper.

"Yes, onna?" Hiei whispered to her in a husky voice and she bit her bottom lip and looked away from him.

"I was wondering when we would...well...when we would..." Botan was trying hard to finish her sentence but it wasn't working for her. Hiei chuckled lightly and made her look him in the eyes again.

"When we would what?" Hiei's smirk was rather large and his eyes were dancing with amusment. He was going to make her say it. The fire demon found it rather cute when she was embarrassed. Botan blushed more and knew she would have to say it because Hiei wasn't going to say it for her.

"When are we going to mate?!" Botan shouted and looked away with a blush. Hiei chuckled and leaned toward her ear. Her heart began to beat faster and her breath hitched. He paused before saying anything, just breathing in her ear.

"Whenever you want." Hiei whispered. He heard her gasp and he pulled back to look at her face. Her eyes were closed and she was biting her lip while her cheeks were burning red. She was trying to block out the blush and nervousness she had and Hiei figured he'd mess with her some to make her blush more. Hiei kissed Botan and her eyes shot open but slowly closed and she kissed him back.

"Do you want to do it now?" Hiei whispered against her lips, a smirk present upon his own. He felt her nod and he chuckled lightly. He pulled away from her mouth and kissed down her neck and got to the joint where her should and neck connected. He gently kissed there and he felt her gasp and push into him. Hiei knew that if he warned Botan about the pain it would only make it that much worse because he would be breaking through tensed muscle. With one last kiss to the spot he bit down. A scream filled the air and he gently licked away the blood and when he knew the wound was healing he pulled back to look at Botan.

Tears of pain were brimming her eyes and Hiei caressed her cheek. She smiled at him and hid her face in the crook of his neck. He held her close and felt her nuzzle him. He smiled and then he gritted his teeth and let out a hiss of pain. She broke the skin on him where he had done to her. She cleaned the wound and pulled back slightly to look at the bite she had given. For her is was only two large puncture holes and then a few shallow ones along the top and bottom. She knew Hiei's though was much deeper. When she pulled back fully she saw Hiei looked at her with love and lust mixed together.

"I love you Botan." Hiei whispered to her and then kissed her. He gently laid her down onto the bed while continuing to kiss her.

"I love you too, Hiei." Botan whispered back between kisses. Then the next that happened was pure love between two beings who thought they'd never be together. It completed the mating ritual and afterward Hiei found himself to be very tired and they both fell asleep.

**Yes there will be some more chapters. Not too many because I don't want to bring this story past its best ending. Well I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thank you for reading and please review.**


	8. Tears caused by a friend

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho**

Yukina decided she would go check up on her friend. She was worried about her and never did find out what was wrong, though one could only assume with Hiei's absence it had something to do with him. She kocked on the ferry girl's door and waited. Within seconds she heard grumbling and giggling. Then the door opened to reveal a robed Botan with a smile.

"Oh Yukina, come in!" Botan said cheerily. Yukina walked in and the sat down on the couch. Botan sat behind her and Yukina heard shuffling in the other room.

"So I see you're not upset anymore." Yukina said and Botan smiled.

"Onna who was-" Hie stopped in mid sentence and saw Yukina. He had only a sheet around his lower half. With a deep blush he shut the door fast. Botan giggled lightly and Yukina had her head turned away from the door. When she heard the door shut she turned herself back to Botan with a sly grin.

"Well Botan, I see where you were yesterdasy." Yukina smirked and Botan blushed deeply. Then her bedroom door was opened and Hiei came out in his normal attire. Yukina stood up and hugged him and then he sat down beside Botan. He noticed the blush on Botan's face and the smirk on Yukina's and couldn't begin to imagine what had been said.

"Well I had just come by to check up on you and to see how you were doing. As I can see you're doing just fine." Yukina winked and stood up and walked to the door. Botan was blushing deeply and Hiei's eyes were wide with surprise. His sister opened the front door and squeeked in surprise. She stepped aside and all three of them watched as Yusuke, Keiko, Kuwabara, and Koenma walked in. Hiei growled low in his throat and Yusuke turned and just stood there staring. Then everyone else did until Keiko broke the silence with a squeal and ran over and hugged Botan and hugged Hiei, who growled in response.

"I'm so happy for you two!" Her woman senses had been tingling and though the two on the couch showed no affection toward each other, she just knew. Yusuke's mouth was ajar along with Kuwabar's. Koenma though was fuming slightly. They shut the door and Yukina decided she might as well stay. She smiled sheepishly at Botan who responded with a sheepish smile of her own. Koenma stalked over to Botan and stood there.

"Botan...may I have a word with you?" Koenma gritted his teeth while saying this. Botan glanced at Hiei who's eyes were blazing with annoyance. She nodded her head and stood up. They walked into the guest room of her apartment and she closed the door.

"What in the world is going on Botan?" Koenma hissed. Botan knew he was seething angry but she couldn't figure out why.

"Hiei and I are mated now, Koenma-sama." Botan made sure to keep a small distance between her and the ruler. He was so angry he had taken out his pacifier and had pocketed it. That was never a good sign.

"You're one step down from angel and the best you could do was Hiei?! An ex-convict!" Koenma quietly shouted (wow that makes sense.) Botan narrowed her eyes at her boss.

"Hiei's a great demon. I don't care if I'm a step down from angel! He's better than what I would have done! He is all I could want and more and I figured as my friend you'd be happy for me!" Botan growled back. She wwouldn't let Koenma talk down about her mate.

"You could have done much better than him! I can't believe you Botan! I thought you were smarter than this!" Koenma shouted, his voice rising a little. Tears filled Botan's eyes.

"This is smart! Hiei will take care of me! I know he will!" Botan shouted back. Koenma glared at Botan and shook his head.

"I can't believe this Botan. I can't believe you." He said in anger. Botan had tears streaming down her face.

"Just because I didn't love you back doesn't mean you can't be happy for me!" Botan screamed at Koenma. She stormed to the door and grasped the door handle when Koenma uttered words she thought she'd never hear.

"Why would I ever love a baka ferry girl like yourself? You're fired." He said and left the room and the apartment. Botan fell to the floor sobbing and Hiei quickly ran in there and a dark aura filled around him. He picked up Botan and brought her to her bedroom. He set her on the bed and everyone came in. Yukina and Keiko rushed to her side and Yusuke and Kuwabara knew something had happened between her and the ruler.

"I'll be back, Onna." Hiei said and walked out of the house. Yusuke and Kuwabara followed but Hiei stopped them.

"I don't need your help." Hiei said. Yusuke growled, thinking Hiei was doing this because of his pride.

"Botan is like our sister! We want to defend her too!" Yusuke shouted.

"She's my mate! I will defend her myself! Koenma only needs to see me!" Hiei shouted. He walked off and Yusuke and Kuwabara stood there shocked. They hadn't ever seen Hiei this passionate about something. Yusuke motioned for Kuwabara to follow him back inside Botan's apartment. They went inside and Hiei went to spirit world. When he entered the ogres and ferry girls kept out of his way. Just the look in his eyes told them to not mess with him. There was one ferry girl who thought different. Right before he reached Koenma's doors a ferry girl named Ayame stopped him.

"Koenma-sama doesn't want any visitors right now." She said hastily. Hiei glared at her and placed a hand on her shoulder and shoved her aside. Not hard enough to hurt her but strong enough to move her. Then with one swift kick Koenma's french double doors were down and dust filled the air. When it cleared all Koenma saw was a seething fire demon. Normally Hiei could keep his actions and body calm but at the moment he was trembling. With very little movement he had the prince against the wall with his katana agianst his neck.

"What did you say to my mate?" Hiei hissed in Koenma's ear. Then he heard Koenma chuckle.

"I said that I would never love a baka ferry girl like herself and that you were a horrible choice for her." Koenma laughed lightly. Then he felt the katana press harder against his neck and he shut up. If looks could kill Koenma would be burning in flames at that moment and Hiei was seriously considering doing that to the prince.

"You are apathetic excuse for a ruler. I should slaughter you here and now." Hiei growled. Koenma smirked.

"But you won't because you know you'll go to prison." Koenma chuckled, figuring he had hold over Hiei. Then the katana was pressed so hard against his throat it was leaving a shallow cut.

"Prison isn't what's keeping me from slicing your pretty little head off. Botan would never forgive me if I killed you. You have no power over me. Remeber that, because next time, whether she likes it or not, I will kill you." Hiei then pulled the katana off the ruler's neck and left. Koenma gently placed his fingers on his neck and when he pulled back he found light red blood. As he watched the retreating form of Hiei, he knew at that moment that anything concerning Botan concered Hiei. With a slightly shaken body Koenma sat down in his chair and dabbed at his neck with a handkerchief.

With a frown Hiei went back to his new home. He had really wanted to kill Koenma but he knew Botan would never forgive him if he did. When he entered the household he saw Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Keiko out in the livingroom. They were sitting upon the couch in silence. When he entered the look up at him and then at the bedroom. Hiei, with worry in his eyes, quickly went into the bedroom. He sighed in relief as he saw Yukina gently stroking Botan's hair and singing to her while she slept.

"She fell asleep a few minutes after you left. I'm sure Botan will be fine. So what did Koenma say to her?" Yukina asked. Hiei shook his head and his sister was fine with that answer. She wouldn't bother either of them about it. Standing up from the bed, she gave him a smile and left. He went and sat down on the edge of the bed and looked at Botan. She opened her eyes and looked back. He was mildly surprised at the fact she wasn't asleep.

"I pretended to sleep so they'd all leave. Could you go and tell them to leave and come back later?" Botan asked quietly. Hiei nodded his head and went into the livingroom and told them to leave. They did and Hiei went back into the bedroom. Botan was sitting up and had her robe still on. He sat down beside her and pulled her close.

"He fired me Hiei. How am I going to get money?" Botan asked. Hiei honestly didn't know how she would manage it. Then she sat up with a smile.

"Genkai's house is big enough, do you think we could live there until I convince Koenma to give me my job back?" Botan asked.

"I think I could convince him." Hiei said while looking at his Katana. Botan shook her head but had a small smile on her lips.

"Acctually, I don't think I want to work for Koenma anymore. Maybe we could get some pay from Mukuro. I wouldn't mind flying to the demon world everyday." Botan suggested. Hiei shook his head. He didn't want Botan to be in the demon world and knew that if Mukuro found out the two were mated and she had her working for her all hell would break loose.

"I'll get your job back." Hiei said. Botan smiled and laid her head on his shoulder. She knew that Hiei was a better choice than anything else she could have made. She also knew she wasn't a baka ferry girl for making the choice either. She was a very smart ferry girl for it.

**I know, I know it's short. I'm sorry for how short it is but I hope that the importance of the chapter made up for the lack of length. Well please review oh and Nikki-4 thank you for giving me so many reviews. You're one of the few keeping me to this story. So thank you.**


	9. Boss threatening and tears shed

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho**

Kurama was sitting at his desk, his pencil tapping against the wood as he pondered a math question. It was not that he didn't understand it but that he couldn't keep hold of his concentration long enough to actually find the answer to the problem. The Fox's mind kept wandering back to Hiei and Botan. He was quite proud of his friend for finding a someone he loved but he could only wonder how long it would be before the two mated with each other. He was hoping that was the reason why he hadn't seen them in a day or two but one can't be too hopeful when it comes to Hiei.

His pencil seemed to tap louder as he mind wondered. He noticed the tone in picth and dropped his pencil. The tapping continued and it was coming from his window. With a small smile he opened the window and allowed his fire demon friend in. Kurama's senses tingled and it seemed that Hiei's scent had changed some. The Fox turned to his best friend and looked right at his shoulder and noticed a small portion of the bite mark Botan had given him. With a smirk, he sat upon his bed and patted the spot next to him for Hiei to sit down. The fire demon declined and leaned against the wall. Kurama would think that Hiei would be happy at that moment and ready to show him that the two were mated but the no longer stout fire demon wasn't. He was leaned against the wall, head leaned back, eyes closed, and arms crossed. His foot pressed against the wall making his knee bent thus giving him an air of annoyance and irritation.

"So I see you marked her and she marked you. I'm very happy for you both." Kurama smiled. Hiei opened his eyes and looked at him.

"Well I'm glad you're taking it so well." Hiei growled. Kurama once again patted the spot beside him and his friend sighed but sat down. There was no use in fighting about it.

"What happened?" Kurama asked gently. Hiei sighed and stared at the wall ahead of him.

"The toddler came after we had claimed each other. He didn't take it too well and fired the Onna..." Hiei didn't finish and Kurama waited patiently. He knew the ex-convict would tell him.

"She told him that he was only angry about it because she didn't love him back..." Hiei paused, snarling quietly at the memory, "And He told her he would never love a baka ferry onna like her and that she could have found a better choice than me."

Kurama growled as he heard this. Botan was like his little sister and no one could talk to her that way. Then he turned to Hiei, and as if reading the Fox's mind (which he wasn't.) he answered the question lingering on the tip of his best friend's tongue.

"I went over and threatend him. I didn't kill him because I knew the Onna would get upset with me if I did. But I did tell him that next time he did anything like that, whether Botan liked it or not, I would kill him." Hiei said. Kurama knew his friend didn't want him to comment on the fact he used her real name instead of calling her Onna.

"She said she doesn't want to work for him anymore and she wouldn't mind working for someone like Mukuro. I refused to allow that because I know how jealous Mukuro would get. I need to get her job back, Fox and since you're presuassive in a calming manner I need you to help me with this." Hiei gritted his teeth as he said the word help. He wasn't one to normally ask for assitance in anything but this situation was a different one. He had already threatened the brat but that didn't work. He knew how good Kurama was at getting people to do what he wanted.

"I'll help you." Kurama said and stood up. He walked to his door and Hiei followed. He went down the stairs and, even being the stealthy fox he was, without turning around his mother asked him where Hiei and him were going. The fire demon was surprised she sensed him. She turned around from baking to stare at the stunned men's faces and she couldn't help but laugh.

"It's a mother's intuition." She explained. Kurama told her that he would be back soon but what he had to do didn't leave much time to explain. He promised he would explain after he came back and she agreed. Then the two demon's left and headed for spirit world. It was a silent trip but no words were needed. Once they reached the building the halls were empty. The ferry girls and orgres were terrified of Hiei and Kurama didn't look too happy either so it was best just to stay away from the two. When they reached Koenma's office doors Hiei took notice that he got them fixed pretty fast. He'd have to fix what was done to his fine job of destruction. With a simple kick to the middle of the doors they fell in a heap of debris and dust. There was an aggitated groan and when the fog dispersed Koenma was found to be in his chair coughing it out of his lungs. When he noticed the two demons, he backed up.

"Hello Koenma." Kurama said in an eerily calm voice that, to anybody listening, would inform you that danger was soon to be issued out by the pink haired man. He advanced on Koenma and pushed the godling into a corner, cowering. His smile wasn't a smile at all but more so a warning. His eyes held fire and his voice held danger in it. The prince could only hope to survive this time.

"H-hello Kurama." Koenma hadn't meant to stutter but the fear in him triggered it. Kurama could probably kill the ruler in less than a second and then his father wouldn't be able to help him at all. He could only hope that the ex convict was in an agreeable mood and he could bargin with him.

"So I hear that you said something to Botan that upset her. Is this true?" Though Hiei hadn't ever said Botan had gotten upset, Kurama knew the ferry girl well enough to know she did. Koenma meekly nodded his head and Kurama's smile widened into a very terrifying grin.

"And that you fired her?" Another nod from the prince.

"So are you going to apologize to her and give her a job back?" Koenma sighed with relief in his head and then nodded to answer Kurama's question. The Fox's smile became gentler and he pulled back so that the prince didn't have to cower in the corner. The godling stood up and straightened himself out. He would have walked back to his desk but Kurama just wouldn't allow that. The ex-convict wasn't done with him yet.

"Are you ever going to say these things to Botan ever again?" Kurama asked. Koenma shook his head and a smirk grew onto the pink haired man's face. He was quite pleased with the answers he got and he backed up enough so Koenma could pass him. The prince took the opporutunity and went to his desk. Calmly and cooly Kurama walked over to his desk and stood behind his chair. He leaned down so he could be close to Koenma's ear.

"If I ever hear about you messing with Botan, then Hiei won't be the only one you'll have to deal with." Kurama whispered and then with a smile left the office.

"I'll be back with the ferry Onna tomorrow. If you leave for 'vacation' then I will seek you out and beat your little godling body to a pulp." Hiei threatened and walked off. Koenma gulped with fear and was sweating across the brow lightly. He wiped it on his sleeve and then sighed while looking at the destroyed doors. He would have to get those fixed again.

Hiei didn't walk back to his home with Kurama. The Fox did a well enough job and Hiei just wanted to get back to Botan to tell her she got her job back. A small smile graced his lips as he reached the door of their aprtment. He knew it was unlocked and he gently opened it and stepped in. He shut it quietly but as soon as he did he was glomped by an excited ferry girl. Hiei was toppled to the ground and had Botan sitting on his waist with a huge smile on her face. She batted at his bangs and he just stared at her with a cocked eyebrow.

"I have news." Botan said, her smile somehow getting larger. Hiei couldn't help but allow a smirk to come to his lips. The blue hair woman giggled at his smirk.

"We're pregnant!" She shouted and hugged him, though it was a tough position to hold she managed. Hiei held her back with slightly wide eyes. Though he was happy the shock was over riding it. He pulled her back slightly as a question occured in his head.

"How?" Botan's face fell into contemplation.

"Well at least I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant. I feel like it. I've never heard of a ferry girl getting pregnant before...but then again they don't fall in love much either." Botan said. She got off Hiei and sat cross legged on the floor. Her face was in total concentration. Then Hiei remembered a ningen product that could tell if a woman was pregnant or not.

"Why don't you take that ninjen pregnant test thing?" He asked.

"It wouldn't show up this early. It shows later." Botan said while thinking. Hiei gently grabbed her arm and pulled her into a standing position.

"We'll go ask Koenma. Also the Fox and I got your job back." Hiei said. Botan smiled at this and then pulled out her oar and flew them to spirit world. They landed in front of Koenma's office which didn't have any doors. The blue haired spirit looked at Hiei and he shrugged his shoulders and walked in. She decided she wouldn't ask what happened because she had a good idea about what did occur. Koenma looked up at them both and looked away quickly when he met Hiei's glare.

"Botan, I'm sorry for what I said to you. You were right and I was jealous. I didn't mean what I said and you can have your job back." Koenma said. Botan jumped up and down and hugged Hiei. He hugged her back and then she remembered the reason they were there.

"Um Koenma, can ferry girls get pregnant?" She asked. Koenma sighed and looked down. He knew that this would come.

"Well it's complicated. The chances of a pregnancy going right with a ferry girl are at a very small percentage." He said.

"How small?" She asked him and sat in a chair that was in front of his desk. Hiei took a seat beside her.

"0.01 percent of a chance of a pregnancy going semi-right." This wasn't going to be easy for him to explain.

"What do you mean 'semi-right' toddler?" Hiei was getting rather annoyed. He wanted children and he would make sure it would go completely right or else hell would pay.

"That percentage is the highest percentage in ferry girl pregnancy...and it's reffering to either deformed, mentally retarded, or mental disordered children, whether the father is demon or not. This is why not a lot of ferry girls bother themselves with falling in love because their maternal instincts kick in and the risks are high." Koenma rubbed his temples. Today was not a good day for the young prince.

"What's the percentage for a ferry girl pregnancy going completely right?" Botan asked. Koenma took in a deep breath. He knew that question was coming sooner or later and he was wishing never. He looked up and met Botan's eyes.

"We don't know." Botan cocked her head to the side in confusion.

"What do you mean, Koenma?" Hiei though had caught on. He knew just what Koenma meant and it was crushing his heart.

"We've never had a ferry girl pregnancy go right that is recorded." Koenma said. Botan's eyes watered up but she bit her lip to keep herself from crying. Koenma looked away to the far wall.

"This is the reason I got so upset with you. I knew that this would happen and you both would want children. Another reason I wanted you to chose me is since I'm a god then the pregnancy would have a higher chance of going right." Koenma turned to look at Botan. "I just want you to be happy and I know that this is tough for you because the both of you want children. You can try but I honestly can't make any promises."

"We'll make sure it goes right Koenma! Hiei is the best demon in the world and his children can survive and kill off any mutations that arise!" Botan yelled while standing up. Hiei knew the words that were going to come out of the prince's mouth before he even said them.

"That means killing even themselves." Botan's heart stopped for a beat and she dropped to the chair in tears. Koenma could only watch on as Hiei tried to comfort his best ferry girl who couldn't help but have an emotional break down. He sighed and walked out to leave them alone. He said all he could and gave them all the information he could and that was the best he was able to do.

**Well there should be a few more chapters explaining her pregnancy. I hope you liked this one. Please review.**


	10. Explanations and childbirth

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho**

It was two weeks after the couple got the news from Koenma and Botan had taken a pregnancy test and it claimed pregnancy. Though the woman felt she should be happy, she couldn't help but worry. She had told Hiei and he seemed worried too. Though he wished that they would be the first successful ferry girl pregnancy, he knew the possibilities of that happening were quite rare.

"Should we tell the others?" Botan seemed dazed and out of it. She had been like that ever since Koenma had given her the news of the pregnancy rate. Hiei tried his best to pull her out of it but it wasn't working too well.

"If you want to, Botan." Hiei gently said to her. He knew he had to be careful with his mate because she was in a fragile state of mind at that moment. Botan slowly nodded and Hiei pulled her into a hug.

"I guess we can set up a get together at Yukina's house." Her voice seemed monotone and off set, as if she wasn't fully there. He shook his head to her suggestion.

"That wouldn't be the best of ideas for you. How about you and I go to Yukina's and tell her, then I tell the rest of the group?" Hiei was being more gentle than any friends had ever seen him. Botan nodded her head and he picked her up bridal style and hurried them off to Yukina's. When they reached the door it was already open. He continued to carry Botan in and Yukina smiled and welcomed them in.

"Yukina, do you have somewhere where she may rest?" Hiei asked quietly. Yukina gave a worried look but nodded her head and he followed her to a bed room and laid Botan down in the bed. He gave a small kiss on the lips and then looked her in the eyes.

"I want you to sleep for now. I'll be back here later." Hiei whispered to her. Botan nodded her head and then the fire demon left the room. Before any words were said, the siblings went into the living room and sat down.

"What's happening, Hiei-san?" Yukina's worried voice asked. Hiei sighed and looked at Yukina.

"Botan's pregnant." The fire demon said it as if it were horrible. His sister was quite confused.

"Why is that a bad thing?"

"We went to the toddler and the Onna asked if she could get pregnant and he said yes but the possibility of it going even semi-right was low. Then he proceeded to tell us that they had never had a ferry girl pregnancy go right and that if we even managed to have a child the chances of it having a deformation, mental retardation, or mental disorder was extremely high." Hiei said. Yukina looked grief stricken and very sad.

"She's in a bad place right now, Yukina and I can't have her trying to explain to everyone about her pregnancy." The fire demon said.

"I'll call up the others and call them over." Yukina said and got up and went to the phone. Hiei was very grateful to his sister for doing that. He sat there in silence and when she was done she said nothing. Everyone arrived around the same time and they were all sitting in the living room, waiting for the the big news.

"Botan is pregnant." Hiei contained an emotionless tone of voice and everyone cheered. After a while it died down and they all realized he wasn't done. When it was completely silent all eyes were on the ex-convict standing before them.

"Koenma has come to inform the Onna and I that the chances of her having a child are small and the percentage of it going even semi-right are even smaller. Most likely our child will be diagnosed with a mental disorder, mental retardation, or have a deformation." The room was in total silence as Hiei explained this to them. Most faces were sad and the happiness that had exploded earlier was as if it never happened.

"I did not have you come here so that you could help 'support' us but because of Botan. She is in a fragile state and I won't have any of you causing her to have a breakdown. She is resting right now and if she ever seems a little off it is because of this. We don't need your money but she needs you all right now. Do not, I repeat, do not go in there and talk to her if I am not in there. Not until I know she'll get better." Hiei demanded. Everyone nodded their heads and he left to go to the bedroom Botan was in. She was, of course, awake and when she saw him come in she smiled a little. He sat down beside her and she hugged him.

"Thank you for doing that." The ferry girl whispered and Hiei just stroked her hair as an answer. No one came in the entire day because they knew that they shouldn't until later.

--- Five months later: Check up ---

Botan had gotten very large over the months and was now at the spirit world doctor. Hiei was standing beside her while holding her hand. Then in came the doctor and Koenma, who hadn't been there a while ago. The couple then began to think the worst but Botan still managed a smile.

"So what is the gender of our child?" Botan asked and a smile burst onto both the doctor's face and Koenma's. The fast heartbeat that both the ferry girl and fire demon had slowed to a normal rate upon seeing the smiles.

"The gender is both boy and girl." The doctor said. Botan's eyes bulged and she stared at the men incredulously.

"I'm having a hermaphrodite?!" Botan cried out. The doctor and Koenma started laughing and Hiei found no amusement in thinking his child was of both genders. Finally when the two calmed down enough they turned more serious but still held smiles.

"No, Botan, you're not having a hermaphrodite. You're having twins!" Koenma cried out with a smile. Botan gasped and smiled while looking at Hiei. He smirked, the most smile Koenma would **ever **see, and squeezed Botan's hand.

"I'm so happy! Hiei, we'll have to start thinking of names for them. Oh I can't wait till they're born! They'll be so cute and they'll be twins and best friends and everything!" Koenma laughed lightly while shaking his head at Botan's excitement.

"Well I'm very happy for you and cannot wait to see how your children will turn out. I just came to help give the news but now I have to work. I think you should have a baby shower for them. Well have fun." Koenma said and kissed Botan's forehead as a form of friendship and left the room. She got dressed and they both left to home.

--- Four months later: Babies are due ---

"Ah!" Botan screamed while she gave a final push and the second baby came out. Hiei had to admit, even though Botan wasn't to great in battle, she had one hell of a death grip. His hand was in pain but he would withstand it until she felt the need to let go. Then the restraint on Hiei's hand let go and he massaged it to get blood flow going.

"Well Mr. And Mrs. Jaganshi it seems that your children are in perfect health." The doctor said and two doctors came in with two babies. They handed the girl to Hiei and the boy to Botan and left the room.

"What should we name them, Hiei?" The ferry girl asked quietly.

"Since you did most of the work you should name them." Hiei said. Though he could give the impression of being a cold blooded killer he had to give respects to any woman who went through child labor because it was probably ten times worse than most of the wounds he had ever received.

"I think we should name the boy Dante Corin Jaganshi. Hiei, I think you should name the girl." Botan said. Hiei nodded his head and looked down at the girl in his arms.

"Kanaji Kori Jaganshi." Hiei said and Botan nodded her head. Then the door opened and Koenma walked in with a smile.

"Well Koenma it seems we've been the first perfect pregnancy." Botan said. Koenma made no acknowledgment to what she said but it seemed she took no notice. She was just happy that she gave birth to two beautiful children. Hiei though could tell that the smile on his boss's face was plastered.

"I'm very happy for you two and I can't wait to see them grow up." Koenma said. Then he looked Hiei in the eyes and it told for Hiei to follow him.

"I'll be back Onna. I need to tell Koenma something." Hiei said and she nodded her head and Hiei gave her Kanaji and left with Koenma. When the door shut behind them, the smile fell.

"Hiei, I can not bear to tell Botan this information and maybe in time you'll be able to." Koenma explained. Hiei was listening intently to what the now teenage form Koenma was saying.

"What can't you tell her?" Hiei asked.

"New born children cannot show any real signs of a mental disorder but we are sure they do not have any mental retardation. When the children reach five years old, start to watch for any developing abnormalities in their personality. If you are worried of something come to me quickly and tell me. It could be a sign of a mental disorder." Koenma said. Hiei nodded his head and the two went their separate ways.

--- Five years later ----

"Happy birthday to you!" The group finished singing. It was Kanaji and Dante's birthday and they were turning five. At the same time, the twins blew out the candles and everyone clapped. They all ate and Hiei sat there watching. Botan was talking to others and the fire demon did not forget what Koenma told him. He had started watching them when they turned four and he noticed strange things with Kanaji and strange things with Dante.

"Daddy, Kiseki isn't too shy to meet you now." Kanaji said. Hiei was now was paying close attention. He had heard Kanaji playing tea party with a boy named Kiseki many times but he could never find the boy.

"Why didn't you wave back, daddy?" Kanaji asked. Hiei waved slightly and Kanaji ran off to go play. Then Dante was sitting beside him. His son turned out to be a very quiet and shy boy unlike Hiei had expected. He was gently kicking his legs back and fourth.

"Daddy...if I jump from this seat, will I die?" Dante asked. Hiei's heart skipped a beat because his child had never asked that. Botan had informed him that children would start to question death at some point but his question seemed abnormal, considering that he had jumped from the seat many times.

"No you won't." Hiei answer and saw tears in Dante's eyes.

"Will Kanaji hurt herself if she was to jump from here?" Again Hiei shook his head. Dante climbed into his lap and clung to his shirt.

"I'm scared daddy!" Dante cried while scooting closer to Hiei. The father's heart was beating fast; There were problems.

**Well that was the last chapter of this story. I am making a sequel of the children's points of view and what is wrong with them. I hope you've enjoyed this story.**


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